Advice to churches: 'Anyone new feels alone and stupid!'

Interviewer: In your visits to churches, how important were first impressions, say during the first 5 minutes of arriving? If the first impression was negative, did you sometimes find the overall experience overcame that?

Jim: VERY important- if ANYONE approached us (without it being their job) it was the exception rather than the rule. It hardly ever happened but when it did we NOTICED. Frankly the lack of that failed to change much else for us since we adapted to the environment and simply stopped expecting spontaneous, unsolicited, non-directed greetings. Here’s how people feel whenever they enter a new experience—alone and stupid. Churches need to “attack” those feelings by training Christians (the non-professional and non-highly motivated kinds) to simply say “hi” to someone who they have not noticed before. That one small action would do more to increase church attendance than any other single action currently being tried.

H/T Benjamin.

Pic is by Elektracute on Flickr

Guest Post: Growing up Christian in Communist China.

Stella goes to my church. She is a great servant of Jesus. I wrote a post a few weeks ago called Why the CHINESE UNDERGROUND CHURCH grew. It was part of a WHOLE SERMON I gave a couple of weeks ago. I was looking for confirmation that what I said was a true and accurate statement of what happens in China. You know how these things can be exaggerated.

Stella wrote the following note for this Blog (She agreed that I could post this publicly):

A note from a Chinese who grew up in a Christian family in China: To be more precise, the 'underground' church in China is actually called 'house church', cos they are located in people's houses instead of public locations.

They are churches not registered in Communist government, but 'have not officially been outlawed'. Due to the 'fears of a center of popular mobilization outside the control of the Communist Party of China', Chinese government tries to control their numbers.

I’ve heard that when a house church goes beyond 30 people, government will interrupt with dismiss or fine or even persecution. But I can’t find the official proof for the specific number.

Actually the restriction varies in different provinces. For the open cities along the coast, there are no specific numbers to restrict the house church; while more severe restriction for inland cities.

My hometown is one of the open cities by the east coast of China, where the house church sometimes goes to over 100 people, but still without government interruption as long as they are not doing anything obviously threatening government, such as preaching something anti-government.

I do agree that the way house church splits might result in the faster growth, which is sort of like 'cell division' type of growth, the size might be small, but the growing is speedy. To quote a Chinese saying ---" a single spark can burn out the whole forest" :)

I then asked Stella if she felt unsafe in church in China. Here is her answer:

While I was growing up, I didn't feel anything unsafe because of my religion. But I was used to going to THREE SELF CHURCH mostly, sometimes going to house church as well. I just follow where my parents go.

My sister is currently in a house church, the one I mentioned in your blog which has over 100 people. I went with her to the Sunday service twice while I was in China last month. I didn't feel anything unsafe at all. It was in the pastor's house. Normally if you would like to open your own house for a public gathering, no matter for what purpose, you are supposed to register in the government. They did so, but government doesn't want them to register, instead they want them to go under the Three-Self church. They don't want to do so, cos they don't agree with the way how Three-Self operates. So the government just let it be without taking any action to interrupt. but I guess maybe they will keep an eye on it.

I guess if anyone wants to ask any questions, Stella may be able to answer! Pray for our brothers and sisters in China.

Thanks Stella.

Post #9: Why the CHINESE UNDERGROUND CHURCH grew.

SCROLL DOWN and read all the posts leading up to this one. But make sure you read the TEXT.

Do you know one possible reason that the underground church grew in China? And I’m not thinking persecution, which is the normal answer. One answer: Because of the communist government made it happen.

I have been told this (and I am looking for people who can comfirm this to be the case): That the communists knew groups were meeting and tolerated them. And monitored them. When a church grew to about 30, they said –

"Look, its OK that you meet, but you can’t have that many. It is potentially subversive."

So they were required to split in two. And therefore they grew and grew, splitting, and multiplying. And they knew each other, and kept each other accountable. I don’t know what this all means for us. We are more than 30 at Christ Church NYC. And we are more than 150 (See previous post).

I guess it will mean starting a new service. (For my non-NYC readers, we are planting a new congregation on April 1st).

Let’s get shrewd and keep thinking about our next congregation / church plant.

V9 (the second thing to learn) coming in a little while...

Post #8: Why GORE-TEX is more shrewd than the people of the Light.

SCROLL DOWN and read all the posts leading up to this one. But make sure you read the TEXT.

Have you read the Fifth chapter in The Tipping Point? The one with "The rule of 150". The book is a secular book. But the writer of Tipping Point asks the question – Why did John Wesley change the world is a way that George Whitfield didn't? Even though Whitfield was more famous in his day, and apparently a better preacher?

The answer, according to The Tipping Point, is this: he started smaller churches wherever he went. No more than 150 in one grouping. And then kept on 'planting'. 150, the book maintains, is a size that cultivates trust and community.

Armies know this. How do you get men to fight with each other and to trust each other? And to utilize gifts? Answer: Group them in groups of 100, and not many more. (They have centurions etc.)

Gore-tex – the coat manufacture takes this perspective. Every factory they have, (and there are 45 Plants worldwide) apparently has only 150 employees. They do this so that you do not have to have 'department heads'. Instead, you have relationships and trust. And do you know how they make sure it’s only 150? -- Make the car park fit only 150 cars! So then you are forced to start a new one factory. Shrewd.

Of course, not every company runs this way, nor necessarily needs to. That’s not The Tipping Point’s point. And I’m not saying that a church should only be 150. We at Christ Church NYC are a touch more than 150. But at least a book like this helps us here in Manhattan to ask the right questions. Not, 'are we big'? But 'is our size optimal for maturity and accountability and touching and transforming more lives for Christ?' What are we aiming for? And what is our 'car park' to make us plant more churches?

I am very keen for comments from readers on this one. Is OSO a reader?

But still...

… the people of the world are more shrewd in dealing with their own generation than the people of the light.

An example of a shrewd church in coming in just a few hours... (When I'm back from IVCF [EU] at NYU. Pray for them will you? Great people. A few of them have joined Christ Church, and we are excited about their lives).

Acts 2 community: There is no going back.

Let me run an idea up the Flagpole ... Please feel free to shoot it down.

I’ve been pondering the widely-held belief that the “Acts 2 Community” is the ideal Christian community: the one to which we should aspire. Here is what that community was like:

• They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching; fellowship; to the breaking of bread and to prayer.
• Everyone was filled with awe.
• Many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles.
• All the believers were together and had everything in common, and they gave to anyone as he had need. etc.

George Barna in his latest [odd] book Revolution basically uses Acts 2 by which to measure all other churches, past and present, saying: "Who wouldn't want to be a part of this?"

And the challenge, of course is that if the Church could get herself back to that, we’d be better off: we’d be more God honouring; less institutional etc. We need real community. And the 'Acts 2 community' is real community we need.

There is no doubt that the text here is describing a situation that is wonderful. That is clear. It’s also clear in Acts 4:32-35. The truth is -- I do want this kind of community. And I think that Acts 2 functions as a wake up call for our often lazy-consumer-driven church experiences.

But I'm not sure that God wants us to go back to this.

I am wondering whether the 'Acts 2 community' is an adequate model for us. It’s not enough. Here are my three reasons why we need to go beyond the Acts 2 Community.

1. They have yet to include a single non-Jewish person.

The Gentile question doesn’t get hammered out properly until Acts 15. God has to give Peter a bizarre dream to get him to move beyond racial boundaries. The Acts 2 community is a racially Jewish community only. It is yet to be inclusive.

Don’t we want the Jew-Gentile community that gets hammered out after Act 15? With all the difficulties that come with reaching out beyond racial comfort zones? I'm glad, as a Gentile, that the community did not remain the way they were.

2. They have yet to be tested under the fire of persecution.

That doesn’t happen until Acts 4 [a 'nibble'], Acts 5 [a flogging], Acts 6 [Stephen arrested], Acts 7 [Stephen murdered], Acts 8 [A full-scale persecution breaks out]. Up until that point, everyone loves ’em.

Don’t we want a Church refined by the fire? One where ‘convenient faith’ is shown for what it really is? Isn’t the persecution and the testing [post Acts 2] one of the most powerful aspects of Acts?

3. They have yet to feel - and work through - disillusionment.

The first ‘problem’ with the community doesn’t happen until Acts 5:1-11. And a major shock to the system it was.

Don’t we want a community that can deal with disappointment in a gospel way? The Acts 2 community had yet to experience the disappointment. Don't we want to be able to cope, without replacing the gospel with inappropriate idealism? I want a Church that reflects Bonhoeffer’s words:

• "Thus, the very hour of disillusionment with my brother becomes incomparably productive, because it so thoroughly teaches me that neither of us can ever live by our own words and deeds, but only by the one Word and Deed which really binds us together--the forgiveness of sins in Jesus Christ. When the morning mists of dreams vanish, then dawns the bright day of Christian fellowship."

I think that I’d prefer the Acts 2 community together with what God does in that community after the ideal is described. God had more blessing for them. And we are the inheritors of that blessing.

There is no going back. Only forward.

Fire away.

Love, Justin.

Only with a hammer in your hand.

I had dinner at a Ukrainian Restaurant yesterday with a gentleman from NYU. We got talking about how to be involved in a local church. In light of that conversation, I offer this [probably overextended] metaphor as a meditation.

God is building his Church. You get that in Ephesians and in 1 Corinthians. Paul moves freely between the metaphors of buildings and bodies. But the body grows as each part does its work.

That means that God is building his Church with you. You are a part of it. You are the building, and, under him, you are a builder.

That would mean that you are a living member of a church only if you have a hammer in your hands. Don’t sit around the building site waiting for someone else to get a hammer. You pick your hammer up and you get building:

Attend the building project. Turn up eagerly [not just early]. Work with your team. Don’t get discouraged when seasons make the project falter. Think about what is required for Christ’s Church to grow. Work from Blueprint. Believe in the project. Invite others to be a part of the project. Always speak with the builder.

There is no sitting in the stands watching someone else build that building [“I’m come for the preaching.”] and there no place for cynicism [“They built this all wonky.”]. Since God is the builder of his church, he’ll do it with or without you. It’s better to be a part of it.

Turn up, pick up your hammer, and get building.

Love, Justin.

PS Read this for the words of a person who honestly struggles with his local church.
And also read this for a critique of the critics.

Attendance is only 'First Base' for Church Life.

*** Bonhoeffer quote coming.

Attendance is only first base for Church life. Some of us still have to get to First Base. And first base is necessary. But we have so much further to go. There is so much more that a community in Christ is required to learn: much more wonder and toughness, joy and pain. I’m speaking on Ephesians 5 this Sunday. I am preparing as I type.

I have to post the quote below, because Bonhoeffer has always [and still] resonates with me.

• Bonhoeffer proposes in Chapter 1 of Life Together, that every believer needs to be able to ‘go-it-alone’ with God [Jesus went to the cross despite the fact that his friends didn’t sign up. He never said: ‘I go if my friends go too’.]
• At the same time he proposes that we need to ‘do-life-together’ [If God gives you one brother or sister to help you pick up your cross, he has then been gracious.] As it turns out, he has given us more than one. Much more.

Both of these have to be true simultaneously. [Never just alone and never just together].

Here is the quote:

"Let him who cannot be alone beware of community. He will only do harm to himself and to the community. Alone you stood before God when he called you; alone you had to answer that call; alone you had to struggle and pray; and alone you will die and give an account to God."

"Let him who is not in community beware of being alone. Into the community you were called, the call was not meant for you alone; in the community of the called you bear your cross, you struggle, you pray. You are not alone, even in death, and on the Last Day you will be only one member of the great congregation of Jesus Christ."

Love, Justin.

PS Anyone else think that Bonhoeffer looks like Christian Anderson's Dad?
And don't post any 'you still like Bonhoeffer' comment. You don't give up on old friends.

Friendship and Church

Just to let you know: we are making some good friends here. We miss our friends in Australia. But we are making some new ones here in NYC.

The picture above is one of The Boy's new friends. Her mom (and dad) lives near us and her mom is having a great time with the Wife!

So this is good.

However, my thought for the day...

We were walking with someone about a month ago in Times Square, and we made the observation that our new church is small.

[But, interestingly, larger than the average American church - don't let the mega-churches fool you. We are at about 100 (+/-) people who we would consider regular. We are growing each year, and for that, I thank God.]

Anyway, our Times-square-walking-partner said: "That's a small church - and you are kind of stuck there - are you sure that you will be able to make any significant friends? Ones that you actually want to hang out with? Someone with common interests? People who are on your wavelength?"

I understand the question. It was harmless enough. Everyone wants to make a friend at church. No one wants to be friendless. People leave churches all the time saying: 'I tried to make friends and I didn't.' And it’s great when you have someone who you feel safe enough to confide in.

All this I get.

However, I just finished spending time in Ephesians. And it struck me that ‘friendship’ is not the unifying feature of church. Jesus’ blood is. So a necessary outcome of the gospel is this: that, in Christ, Jew and Gentile are friends and therefore learn to be friends. They do not go to church looking for a friend. They are friends already because of Jesus, and therefore this needs to be expressed.

I can imagine in the early church, a Jewish believer saying: ‘I hope that I can find a significant friend who is like me’. And I can imagine a Gentile believer saying: ‘I hope that I can find someone with whom I can have a bacon and cheese burger on Saturday afternoon.’

But for Paul, being in Christ means that you necessarily [and deliberately] spent time with people different to you: people who you might not have naturally been friends with. The Dividing Wall of Hostility has broken down, and in Christ the Jew and Gentile stand together with common access to God. And this therefore needs to be expressed in the Church.

Said here: Ephesians 2:11-22, which necessarily leads to here: Ephesians 4:1-6.

The upshot of this in my mind is this [at least this is the theory]:

When I come to Church, I do not go looking to find the person who is most like me. I look for the person most unlike me and learn to express the unity that already exists by our common access to the Father.

I don’t go to Christ’s church looking to make some friends.
I make friends because it is Christ’s church.

If you do this, you will of course surprise yourself by making some surprisingly good friends.

We have already.

Very Bonheoffer, without the eloquence.

Love, Justin.